The Definitive COD Rankings

This entire blog is being done on my phone. To begin, I am publishing this blog for 2 reasons.

1. GT requested it

2. I have a 4 hour train ride to Providence, RI and I’m already bored.

The criteria for COD Rankings must be split into 2 different categories. Multiplayer Rankings and Warzone Rankings. These games are extremely different therefore they require separate comprehensive lists. First will be the Multiplayer Rankings. This list will include league members and non-league members alike. If you wish to have anyone added please send me an email and I will add an addendum to reflect these changes.

Multiplayer Rankings

1. Donald – Often times plays for himself only but it is a strategy that has done him favors in multiplayer. An aggressive player who can take on multiple engagements and often has many kills. One con is he doesn’t play well with others and many times cares more about kills than game objectives.

2. Ryan – If Ryan could learn the maps a bit more and fix his dog shit internet he may just overtake Donald but for now he sits at #2 with a high ceiling.

3. Steve – Similar to Ryan, very sporadic in his commitment to the multiplayer grind but inside him is an innate knowledge and precise shooting that allows him to play well in most game modes.

4. Keegan – Possibly one of the streakiest players in our player pool. Keegan can completely take over a match and Ace and entire team in Search and Destroy. He can also be caught at the bottom of the leaderboard due to positional issues as well as communication struggles. A good shooter with decent IQ but often times predictable.

5. Fergie – An immensely talented shooter but lacks discipline. Often times takes on multiple firefights at once without help only to be rolled. 1 v 1 there aren’t many better players in the field but he has a tendency to go rogue which hurts his draft stock.

6. GT – A difficult player to place on our rankings. When it comes to SnD his strategy and planning is at the top of our leaderboard. His map knowledge is strong, when it comes to respawn games such as TDM and Domination he can be hit or miss as far as shooting is concerned. He has transition to a Rogue Pro now so COD is clearly in his rear view mirror.

7. Don Eaves – Gunfight Champ who may be higher on this list if he played more COD but his obsession with Rocket League has become unhealthy and threatens his very existence on this list in general. However, if you catch him in his sweet spot between sober and ripped off the devils lettuce he can be a game changer for that 30 minute time span.

8. Leffler – A player with immense attitude issues. Can go on streaks in respawn games and totally pop off but he performs best when muted. Watches a lot of streams but still has no clue what each map looks like. One pro is his coms are very accurate although deafening. *Trigger Warning*

9. Josh Reich – Josh simply lacks gun skill. He has a new headset which may help his in game awareness. Many times he will leave his entire body exposes for the other team to fill with bullets. If it wasn’t for our next player he would be easily the lowest in this group.

10. George – Plays on a 80 inch TV and sits across the living room. Often kills enemy’s when they are reloading or AFK. Recently got a brand new headset and still can’t hear someone in his building. His biggest pro is he takes criticism better than any player in the field and will chirp the other team even if he goes 4 and 30. Fun was had by all.


1. Ryan – The man is a dub getting machine who has backpacked each player on this list at least once. Could pop off more if he played more aggressively but you can’t argue with results. He’s a born winner, Tom Brady.

2. Josh Reich – FUCK YOU KEEGAN. Since being called out for being backpacked by Ryan constantly he has proven successful in Verdansk by amassing over 100 wins before anyone on this list. Strategy is the name of the game for Josh. Make the other teams fight is a staple of his play style.

3. Leffler – He is Ryan Reed lite. Good coms, solid strategy developed by watching way too many streams and subbing to no names just to attempt to further his own Twitch Career. Can be heard nearly nightly yelling GEORGE! Does not have the ability to carry a squad on his own but is a strong in game leader who can position his squad for end game glory.

4. GT – He brings his Search and Destroy prowess to Warzone and has enjoyed great success. Much like Josh he benefits from playing with our #1 player but is a strong support player and has been known to clutch up a time or two.

5. Donald – All Gas, No Brakes. In the blink of an eye he will be on the other side of Verdansk hunting a solo down only to run into a team of 3 waiting to team shoot him. To his credit he can take on 2-3 players alone but that’s just it, he’s often alone. Better make sure you have 4,000 bucks on hand and you’re near a buy station.

6. Fergie – The next few players we’re very tough to rank. Fergie gets the edge here because of his recent string of success. He does play with some absolute freaks but 34 team kills and a dub would be a top game in any tournament held by

7. Steve – Don’t remember the last time he dropped into Verdansk but he has the ability to adapt to many play styles. Tunnel vision is one issue this player faces. If Steve can begin thinking 2-3 steps ahead he can rule Verdansk with an Iron Fist.

8. Keegan – FUCK YOU KEEGAN is echoing in his head. The kid has the yips, the likes of which we have never seen. He is well versed in Battle Royale game modes and is a strong shooter but gets lost in the sauce when his feet hit the ground in Verdansk.

9. Don Eaves – A fine player who has pulled off a dub or two in his day. Due to a fault completely of his own he often wanders away from his pack. Don’t ask where he got killed from cuz he likely is muted or just doesn’t know. You guys wanna get a private match of Rocket League going?

10. George – 0.62 KD and has been dubbed the “Meat Shield” for his affinity to catch bullets more often than he catches dubs. Can not locate players who are literally live pinged right in front of him. Needs to get signed and written permission from his wife for an hour time slot twice a week to play.

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