Work is slow but the NFL offseason is NOT so I figured we would take the time to start generating some interest in our upcoming draft and what better way to do that then to critique every team and do a pre-NFL-draft mock draft? I will first objectively evaluate each team by need and then mock the best prospects available to fill such need. The top tier teams were Don and Ryan so they get a bit more explanation as to “need.” Everyone else was a bit more obvious.
Disclaimer: This does not reflect my personal big board. I am using expert rankings. I am also only going 3 rounds, rookies only, because people think I do work around here and am not doing trades because that is a rabbit hole.
Kittles and Blitz: Oh Don, our new Naomi. Don’s only team need is RB and WR depth. Otherwise, Don is sitting pretty with unclear as he is rock solid at TE, has elite top end WRs, is content at QB, and has viable starting RBs. Don also has a full slate of picks this year as well as an extra first this year, damn it Frank.
Blockhead Boys: Arguably the most complete roster and boasting the RB1 and WR1 for dynasty as well as 2 top 10 QBs, Ryan only “needs” a RB and WR depth. Ryan also has a full slate of picks this year.
Josh Allen is Your Daddy: Needs WR, RB, QB (depth).
New Stove in the Kitchen: Glaring need at TE. Secondary need for WR depth.
Frank’s Process: Needs a better culture and a GM who drafts upstanding citizens and understands COVID-19 is real. Also QB, TE (depth), RB (depth).
Is this my year?: Needs to learn to love young NFL players. Could use some serious help at WR, TE (depth), RB (depth)
Jafaris Jamar Jafarison-Lamar: RB2, RB3, RB4, TE. Who are we kidding, Jafar is taking a QB or a WR at 3.
Albany Fantasy Football Team: First, will the Football Team follow suit and update their team name? I hear “Commanders” is a big hit. Needs QB depth after a wild off-season gutted his promising position group. Secondary needs at RB and WR. I note that the Hill trade could drive his need at WR up if Hill’s fantasy output plummets and GT sits in the enviable position of having the top two picks.
Sutton to Believe In: Needs QB, TE, WR (starter). I have the depth and I have the picks, I just need to find the studs.
Chalupa Batmans: Poor Sacko. The offseason is a cruel mistress and decided to take it all out on Sacko. Sacko has a surprisingly frisky starting lineup but needs depth at every position other than QB because, as we saw, he has no ability to withstand injuries and that has only gotten worse. Get a shaman to come in and cleanse the franchise. I suggest starting with some burning sage.
1.1: (GT) Breece Hall, obviously
1.2: (GT) Garrett Wilson (GT let the Hill trade get to him)
1.3: (Jafar) Drake London (I believe Jafar believes he does not need a RB2)
1.4: (Josh) Kenneth Walker III
1.5: (Frank) Isiah Spiller
1.6: (Josh) Treylon Burks
1.7: (Stove) Jameson Williams – I think Stove secretly loves the Patriots and gets the guy who they get
1.8: (Keegan) Christian Watson
1.9: (Ryan) Jahan Dotson
1.10: (Don) Malik Willis – shocker, but Don’s faith in Lawrence is shook
2.1: (Sacko) Zamir White
2.2: (GT) Skyy Moore
2.3: (Ryan) George Pickens
2.4: (Josh) John Metchie
2.5: (Donals) After finding no one willing to trade him a player over 28… Trey McBride
2.6: (Don) Rachaad White
2.7: (Jason) Pierre Strong Jr.
2.8: (Keegan) Kenny Pickett
2.9: (Ryan) Jalen Tolbert
2.10: (Don) Alec Pierce
3.1: (Keegan) Khalil Shakir
3.2: (Jafar) Matt Corral, obviously Jafar needs a QB
3.3: (Stove) David Bell
3.4: (Keegan) Brian Robinson Jr.
3.5: (Jafar) Dameon Pierce
3.6: (Frank) Jeremy Ruckert
3.7: (GT) Tyler Allgeier
3.8: (Keegan) James Cook – Frank gets angry here
3.9: (Ryan) Desmond Ridder
3.10: (Don) Daniel Bellinger
Wasted Talent 