My pre-draft mock draft had a breakdown of each team’s biggest needs and mocked players that made sense to fill those holes. Since that post, we have had our rookie draft as well as a record number of offseason trades. Here I will critique each team’s efforts to fill out their roster, identify biggest weaknesses heading into the season, and tell four sad souls they will not be in contention for the Naomi.
Kittles and Blitz: Don’s greatest needs pre-draft were… depth. That guy has a great squad and not much has changed. He walked out of the draft with quality depth improvements at WR in Olave and Pierce and scooped up a steal in Zamir White. Weaknesses: none. Prediction – Deep playoff run.
Blockhead Boys: Like the team he lost to in the Naomi last year, Ryan had no glaring holes and only needed WR and RB depth. Well, he walked away with Watson and David Bell to fill out his WR room AND a starting RB in Dameon Pierce. Ryan continues to work his gypsy magic. Weaknesses: none. Prediction – Deep playoff run.
Josh Allen is Your Daddy: I had identified Keegan as needing a WR, a RB, as well as a quality backup QB to Allen. In this deep WR class Keegan made some savvy moves and escaped with a high upside receiver/stripper in Skyy Moore, an intriguing WR in Tolbert, and secured Pittsburgh’s starting QB by grabbing Pickett to pair with Mitch. But Keegan went on to make a couple big trades where he capitalized on his impressive TE room landing Jerry Jeudy, Michael Carter, and Albert O in exchange for Amari Cooper, Schultz, and Goedert. An impressive roster churn to give Keegan a good chance at avoiding the Sacko bracket. I think he succeeded. Weaknesses: TE/QB depth. Prediction – Shallow playoff run.
New Stove in the Kitchen: “Glaring need at TE. Secondary need for WR depth.” Direct quotes from my prior article. Stove read my expert analysis and went out and made a very bold move to push himself into Naomi contention trading away a 2023 first and Barkley to land aging, but elite, Kelce. Separately him and Jafar worked together to land Gabe Davis. In the draft Stove doubled down on Buffalo and drafted James Cook before adding Brian Robinson Jr. (pre-gunshots) and Trey McBride, the draft’s number 1 tight end. A great haul for a promising roster. Weaknesses: TE depth. Prediction – Deep playoff run.
Frank’s Process: In stark contrast to Stove, Frank did not read my expert analysis. There has been zero change at the top and that culture is one to watch out for. The extreme toxicity has sunk this squad in the past and it looks like it may rear its ugly ahead again to destroy this improved roster. Frank went out and addressed his biggest need after the surprising second retirement of Gronk by trading for Goedert, a very underrated TE. His QB room is shaky and may sink him if Tua does not rise to the occasion but the addition of Burks gives him a young WR room to be feared if he emerges this year. Weaknesses: QB. Prediction – Shallow Sacko run
Rub and Tug, formerly known as “Is this my year?“: Donals is in a transition period and was without a first round pick this year in the ill-fated Chris Carson trade and was bit again when James White retired after spending his 5th round pick on him. Donals added intriguing WR Dotson in the draft and grabbed Hurst off waivers who has a chance to contribute with the Bengals this offseason. Alas, this was not enough to allow Donals to contend for his third Naomi. Weaknesses: Yes. Prediction – Deep Sacko run.
Jafaris Jamar Jafarison-Lamar: RB, RB, RB, now TE. Jafar’s needs entering the draft were clear as his QB room is the envy of all and his WR room is filled with a solid mix of aging veterans and promising youth. GT must have known Jafar wanted a RB and snagged Hall and Walker leaving Jafar with the option of reaching on Cook or going BPA. Jafar wisely chose the latter and added Wilson to his deep WR room (nailed this prediction), where he continued adding with Doubs and Wan’Dale (because Jafar hasn’t met a Giants WR he did not like). If Dillon emerges and Barkley fills Jafar’s RB2 hole then he may make it back to the Naomi bracket but I just do not see this happening. Weaknesses: TE and RB. Prediction – Shallow Sacko run.
“Breece’d Up Deaf Guy”, formerly known as the “Albany Fantasy Football Team”: The fanbase clamored for a new name, ownership delivered (I do not understand the team name but ignore that for now). GT had a draft that could transform his franchise landing Hall and Walker at 1-2, which were big needs based on his RB health/disappointments before trading out of the second round to accumulate picks in the promising 2023 draft. Willis is a high-upside future backup to Burrow GT landed late along with what seems to be a steal in Thornton in the 5th round (not sure what drunk dummy traded out of this pick so GT could land him). GT is a hard team to predict. Weaknesses: Current RBs (pending Dobbins health) and QB depth. Prediction – Shallow Naomi run.
Sutton to Believe In: I will be unbiased. I came into the offseason needing an upgrade at TE and landed one in Schultz. I also needed WRs who could contribute immediately. I am unsure I landed one but escaped with Drake London, Jameson Williams, Pickens, and landed Amari Cooper in the Schultz trade and have 4 guys who should all be WR2s if they stay healthy. My QB room is giving the fanbase some anxiety as ownership has failed to land a superstar at any point in the history of the franchise but if Lance emerges I can make a run this year and the future seems bright. Weaknesses: QB and WR1. Prediction – Shallow Naomi run.
Chalupa Batmans: Sacko, Sacko, Sacko. Without a first round pick (worth it for Pitts) Sacko needed to find some depth in this trade. Credit to Sacko for shooting all his shots to land some RB depth in drafting Rachaad White, Spiller, Allgeir, and TDP in one draft! next year he may have 1 or 2 hit but it looks like none will be helpful this year. If Sacko avoids injuries and Smith or Moore take a step forward Sacko can make a run. If not, Sacko is looking like he is a repeat candidate. Weaknesses: health, depth at all positions outside QB. Prediction – Deep Sacko run
Summary: It is clear there are three tiers in our league: Contenders, Wild Cards, and Sacko Candidates.
Contenders: Black Don, Ryan, Stove
Wild Cards: Frank, Josh, GT, Keegan, Jafar
Sacko Candidates: White Don and Sacko
Best of Luck.